The Divine Miss M

Look at this face! It's like a distinguished Molly Ringwald!
But I maintain that Better Midler looks way better at 64 then Molly ever has at 41.

I really like Better Midler, and so does my mom. But for different reasons.
Born unto a seamstress in Honolulu, she was raised in one of the few Jewish families in a neighborhood of Asians. (Bette, not my mom.)

Top 5 best Bette Midler roles:

- The First Wives Club. "Now, I ask you, Duarto, who's supposed to wear that? Some anorexic teenager? Some fetus? It's a conspiracy! I've had enough. I'm leading a protest. I'm not buying another article of clothing until these designers come to their senses!" Her rivalry with Sarah Jessica Parker in this movie really makes me want to be a more vicious woman.

- The Women. Divorced women eating sticks of butter and deciding they are, in fact, the men they want to marry. She gives an amazing soliloquy on how selfishness is the secret to life. The best part of the entire movie is when her character busts in on a divorced womens yoga circle in the wilderness and is all outraged that the class starts so early. The instructor goes "We always canoe at dawn" and Bette's like "I always fake my orgasms. That doesnt make it right" IN A YOGA CIRCLE OF DIVORCED WOMEN IN THE WILDERNESS!!

- The Rose. A movie based on the life of Janis Joplin, starring Bette Midler. Need I say more!

- Hocus Pocus. I don't understand how both her and Sarah Jessica Parker can be made to look like tranny warlocks but still be fucking hot.

- The Stepford Wives. Her house is a fucking pig stye in this and its pretty funny. Other than her, this movie is kind of lame.

I think my generation really hasn't appreciated Bette Midler for all she has to offer. She's also a Vegas show girl and rad singer. They say she is going to play Carrie's mom in the Sex and the City sequel. (Miley Cyrus is also going to be in that shit. Which may actually have an effect on my viewing the movie.)

(Of course I will view it, but I will look on with disdain at the parts with non human Miley Cyrus.)