"If a bullet enters my brain, let it break open every closet door in the world".
- Harvey Milk

iO Tillet Wright - New York photographer ....

ISNT THIS SHIT AMAZING ! Check out her blog in my favourite links.

(If she ever sees this, I hope she's not pissed I put her stuff on here. I just thought you should know about it !!!)

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Simone: Do you have any dreams?
Pee-wee: Yeah, I'm all alone. I'm rolling a big doughnut and this snake wearing a vest...

"With my reading of books, months passed without my even thinking about being imprisoned. In fact, up to then, I never had been so truly free in my life"

-Malcolm X

Since I love lists so much ...

I think everyone should have a (tangible) list of their favourite bars in the city.

But first, here is a list of criteria by which you can make your own favourites list. It is the criteria I follow when making such lists. In fact, this information scans up before my eyes every time I enter a bar, like the Terminator.

1. Layout. I enjoy a bar that I feel I could play hide and seek in, a bar with knooks and crannies. P.J. O’Brien, the Irish pub on Colbourne street off Yonge has a bunch of little hideouts. You could probably do some lewd shit in this bar, now that I think of it. The Foggy Dew on King Street also has an unsuspectingly awesome layout. High wood walls on their booths, and booths where you wouldn’t expect booths.

2. A favourite bar must have an interesting menu. Pub fare is usually boring and lame. I appreciate a place that makes the most of having little to no kitchen. Starving Artist totally wins this one. They do every waffle of the rainbow – and waffles are an excellent drunk food. They are sort of a cafe too, and do brunch, with even more creative waffle dealios like smore’s and what not. The Painted lady has some crazy shit too, like “white trash nacho’s” which consist of cheese whiz and chilli over Fritos. They also have Gazpacho and mushroom carpaccio. The Crooked Star isn’t to bad either. They have mad cheap eats, and a particularly dope vegetarian curry roti.

3. Ease factor. You must ask yourself: Does it feel easy for me to be in this bar? That’s the main reason the Last Temptation scores so high on my list. I don’t really know many people who haven’t made out with a stranger in this bathroom. In order to feel comfortable, I have to know that I have made out with strangers in the bathroom. I’m joking, but in all seriousness I pretty much feel like I could do whatever the fuck I want in this bar and the servers wouldn’t give two shakes of a lambs tail.

4. The drink selection must be adequate, but not overwhelming. It takes me like, 12 years to read the beer list at the Rhino. I like beer a lot, but really, I’m simply wasting drinking time with perusing such a colossal menu. Tortilla flats has a pretty good drink menu, and you can get enormous cocktails for super cheap. I hate martinis and everything they stand for, generally, but for you, Tortilla Flats, I will gladly get drunk on them. Oh, and Black Dice Cafe has a crazy selection of sake martini’s, which is imaginative.

5. This is not a necessary requirement, but bars with board games are like a dress with pockets – just a lot better.

6. Location must be convenient. If I feel like I’m going to have to take drastic measures to get home, like wait for the streetcar for 5 hours, or resort to riding a pesky, uncomfortable camel, well, you can count me out, mister. I can't get comfortable in a place knowing my trek home will be hell in a handbasket. Disgraceland works for me because I can stumble like 50 meters and be home safe and sound with little to no bruising.

7. I like a bar with plants. The Done Right Inn on Queen West has this epic three right in the middle of the patio. It’s magical. I also do appreciate how many spider plants are in the Imperial Pub, even though it didn’t make my top ten. Honourable mention.

8. A really excellent bar will whisk you out of your own reality and make you feel like something of a star. Red Light has an awesome back room with couches that makes you feel like you have stumbled upon a porn set. Black Dice Cafe on Dundas is also a rockabilly paradise. Being in there kind of makes me feel like I might actually be able to pull off short bangs, black hair and red lips. Even if only for the time I’m drinking in there. The Emmet Ray on College has a really lovely interior, in fact it inspires me to adopt a classier lifestyle, which is not an easy feeling to have when getting drunk and struggling to keep it together, appearance wise.

9. Music selection must be interesting. By interesting I mean I like a bar that’s not too proud to play some hits. When I get drunk, there’s nothing more I like to hear than Lady Gaga. I’m not ashamed, you know? I love Ted’s Collision, but that bar plays a lot of the same shit all the time, and I abhor that Journey song they always play at last call. Gag me with a spoon.

10. Drink deals are imperative. The Lab is pretty good, but their deals involve mostly things I personally don’t get down with, such as Jagger. Souz Dal has some good martini deals, and you can’t go wrong with 3 dollar mixed drinks on a trashed Tuesday.

Here are my top ten. Not in any particular order at the moment. Please don't judge me too hard based on this list.

1. Last Temptation (kensington)
2. Green Room (Annex)
3. Souz Dahl (Little Italy)
4. The Local (Roncy)
5. Disgraceland (Bloorcourt)
6. The Painted lady (Ossington and Dundas)
7. Starving Artist (Bloor and Landsdown ... Blandsdown)
8. Cloak and Dagger (College and Major)
9. The Done Right Inn (Queen west)